I'm sorry

So apparently people do read what I write on here....

Because of that I want to let you all know that this is just a way for me to vent and isn't EVER meant to hurt anyone's feelings. I honestly wouldn't post things about people if I thought they cared enough about what I thought to read it. I'm pretty sure that my dislike/frustration with MOST people is shared completely and I feel that venting in a "safe" place is better than blowing up at someone to their face. I also feel that there is a fine line between venting and talking shit and I'm sorry if anyone feels that I have crossed that line.

oh BABY!

So good news!!!!:

Baby Amelia Mary Koory was born yesterday (August 24th) morning!
I can't wait to meet her!

Also,
my parents are in town right now. They got here around two. We went to the apple store (b/c my mom has to be present for them to sell me a phone apparently) and I got a new, non-cracked-screen iphone! Yay!
After that we (wait for it--what a treat!) went back to Alpha Delts and I showed my parents around the frat I call home (haha). Of course my mom looked in my fridge and was probably disappointed in my lack of food and abundance of booze. It's mostly other ppls (in my defense).
Then we went to Jalisco's for some delish Mexican.
Since we were already up north and my dad needed shoes we went to Nordstrom and then after having zero luck finding my dad's size 13 wide tennis shoes we went to Joe's. We got him some sweet sneeks there (which, if anything like his current pair of shoes, he will wear until the day he dies--or until the day I decide he's FINALLY old enough to earn that pair of grandpa shoes he was eying that wouldn't allow him to purchase).
Across the way from GI Joe's is Ross. My mom wanted to go (and let me tell you this is not some place I normally enjoy... too much mess for my liking) but I found myself in the shoe section looking for about 1/2 hour with my dad for the mate to a BEAUTIFUL pair of round-toe heels. AND (drum roll) they were only $10! Whoo. Thanks Dad for all your help finding my shoe mate! Ha.
Then we went back to their hotel (decca). They're on the 15th floor and have a really sweet view of lake washington, lake union, the skyline, the space needle, the mts (everything basically). I had to leave their room to come back to the frat so I could get my phone which was charging in my computer, but we're gonna go get some ice cream pretty soon...
yay mom and dad <3

new habits die hard

so far today I have only consumed about 150 calories.
I've had 4 prunes and a cup of coffee.

this could be attributed to the fact that it's only three, I've been studying LSAT since I showered and I didn't wake up until 10:45 because I lent my mind (and body) to dreams about bingen bars with boys who shun me and internment camps.

But, I think the culprit is probably my lack of a kitchen and the fact that I know that I'll go out for dinner. I go out for dinner (or happy hour-because of the cheap food, not the alcohol which I rarely ever decide on these days) almost daily. If it weren't for restaurants I don't know what I would do. probably starve. or grocery shop. Thanks to those calorie packed meals I seem to be sustaining the weight I gained from a July filled with fratty alcohol and a lack of exercise.

I need to bring back those better, healthier eating habits (lifestyle) I am usually so anal about.

Rod McKuen

http://www.mckuen.com/poetry/rediscover.htm

this is the most amazing thing I've read in a long long time.
go read it (again and again)

(thank you Heather (and Jessie) for introducing me to the joys of McKuen's poetry!)

Tonight...

...Erin and I watched the season premier of "The Hills"
and
the soundtrack was really good
and
I/we really like the "American Boy" song. A lot.
and
we also read magazines that we got from ZTA (and learned things)
and
we got (sober) Memos. It was a bad bad BAD choice (we were hungry after our LSAT review session). Now I understand why everyone always (drunk) vomits after eating there. Don't go there sober. Just don't do it.
Memos might be ruined forever for me, or maybe just for a few weeks!
and
it was our (Erin and my) infinite day in a row of sister dates, because we always want the same things at the same times.

personal statement

I should really be studying for the LSAT right now. I guess I should always be studying for the LSAT, it's really important apparently. And, I have a study session in like 45 minutes, but Erin and I just got back from one of our many many Sister dates - we went to blue c for sushi - we always want the same things at the same time. When we got back I got on the internet, and if you're reading this then I know you know that its a neverendingdownwardspiral.

I find myself longing for simpler things and the summers of childhood:

homegrown/homecooked foods

kittens <3

my mom's flowers
nature

History / memories
I've climbed on this shed, skinned/hung deer in here, got spanked in here, played basketball on the side, found kittens in here... and I'm sure my dad has similar childhood memories in /on/around this same shed since he has lived next door his whole life...

and being able to be away from "it all" completely and totally. I miss being able to go outside and not hear anything but the birds and the wind. I miss being able to see ALL of the stars at night, vividly. I miss trying to drag people outside to be with/watch the stars with me. I miss those people/that person.

My new life is pretty great too though. Just a lot different. I wonder if things will ever go back to that previous state? I guess probably not. The fact that all of my friends, friends of my friends, exes and friend's exes are having babies is probably a sign that our childhoods are over and its time to create something amazing for the ones we love.

(too bad my personal statement can't just be a compilation of pictures, memories and feelings!)

On the bright side though, I'm very very very excite for Crystal to have her baby girl. I can't wait to finally meet her and finally learn her name. Abbey is going to be an amazing big sister and I KNOW Crystal is going to be so happy to get that baby out of her tummy (any moment now!)

yachting

Yesterday I went yachting on a 94 foot tugboat turned personal craft with the alpha delt boys, a few girls and some Alumns. It was pretty amazing. I had a beer and "a wine" and by the time we left I had a few job offers from Alums and a ton of new bffs. Haha. It was a good time... I'll show you:

seattle sunset from Shilshone Bay:

AlphaDelt PC08, including Jeremy (the newest member):

Jay's girlfriend and myself:

wow, really?

On the front page of the Seattle Times today (we saw it from inside of Costas while I was having breakfast with Joel and his dad) there is an article titled "How Old is "Old Enough" to Hunt?". So when I got home I got online and read it (obviously, I mean, I do love reading a newspaper but the internet is so much more efficient sometimes).

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2008109739_hikershot13m0.html

What the fuck was this kid thinking? I got my first deer when I was in 8th grade (13 years old) and I was DEFINITELY old enough to realize that it was a deer and not a PERSON! I cannot believe this happened. I am also in awe of the fact that 50 8-year-olds acquired big game tags this year. I'm pretty sure we all know that those 8-year-olds are really fathers of the kids who want an extra deer (deer is delish) to feed their families with this winter. But still! I thought you had to be a certain age (like 10 or something) to even take hunters education (which is necessary if you want to purchase a hunting tag). Wow. I just cannot believe this. Dumb kids giving everyone else a bad reputation. Anyway, I'm going to go start on my personal statement now (about living on a farm and hunting... I think). Wish me luck!

OH and PS I totally had a dream about the LSAT last night. I tried doing problems in my sleep and then I woke up right after I was taking the test and the building started to collapse and I couldn't get out because I just wanted to finish so I could go to law school. What do you think that means?

that's what I get

I wonder how I'm supposed to feel when you're not here, because I've burned every bridge I ever built while you were...