troubles

The snow is finally melting (yesterday the slushyness on the roads, especially in hood river, was a giant disaster). I am so happy. it's raining now.

I am super frustrated right now. Honesty is something which I value in my relationships and someone in one of my most important relationships is blatantly keeping something from me. I don't think that is ok. I am really frustrated and hopefully my explanation of why it is not ok to keep things from me gets through to them, even though they have an extreme anger issue and just got mad at me for being frustrated (b/c the only reason I want to know is "because I'm jealous" wtf? that isn't true, the only reason I would be jealous is b/c ppl are keeping things from me/being sketchy). UGH. SO pissed.
I need to do something to get my mind off of this.

AND one of my letters of rec still isn't in to the LSAC forcing me to ask one of my profs from last quarter to write me a letter which needs to be in by, oh, monday. UGH. This morning is horrible.

The first thought I have waking up (for the last few mornings in a row) is WHAT IF I DON'T GET INTO LAW SCHOOL? such a terrible first thought of the day. It strikes fear into my heart.

Today I need to finish editing my personal and diversity statements. I need to submit applications today and tomorrow.
I need that letter of rec really bad. now.

snowy day

right now I'm enjoying some christmas eve eggnog (I LOVE eggnog) and I just braved the outside coldness to take a picture (my parents wanted me to) of the icicles on the front of our old house and the snow on the trees...

Well, this is Sanborn Road....


the view from my driveway of our field


and the icicles on the old house (I do love icicles!!)

Rebeka:

wants her cat snack to stop coming in her room and taking all of her hair ties and headbands.

wants to not be snowed in anymore.

finally showered.

is happy that brother jim pried her trunk open (hello christmas presents and booze ha).

really wants to leave. a lot.

needs coffee.

snowy day

Last night I got back from a wonderful visit to the Peterson home in Federal Way. I enjoyed some Christmas shopping, coffee, breakfast (thanks to Joel), outback, being the designated snow driver, and snowy fun.



Also on my way home I stopped and saw Micah in Portland for the first time since he left. It was wonderful. I got to meet his new GF too.

But it took like three hours to get home from Portland b/c of the intense snow... and then I BARELY made it up snowden/through White Salmon. I was really really proud of myself and my awesome snow driving skills though.

Now I'm snowed in because of the snow emergency or whatever.... You're not supposed to leave your house unless you HAVE to. Ugh. Bored.

White Salmon

Saturday I got bangs.





Yesterday I was snowed in all day.



(exciting things are happening daily)

lasts

I'm taking the LSAT tomorrow and I'm ready; I'm going to dominate.

:)

Santa, let's have a pic!

today I went with Crysta, Abbey and Amelia to get Santa pics!
(LOVE those girls!!!)

Abbey was more excited about riding the bus downtown than anyone should EVER be.. it was really cute though

Amelia got called "he" 4 times (one more than I predicted haha)

We waited in line for 2 1/2 hours, because I think Santa was hitting the booze (probably why he called Amelia a "he" for the 4th and final time after taking a picture with her and learning her name). But while Crystal and Amelia waited Abbey and I went to starbucks for a "special milk" for her and a latte for me. I got asked if "she was mine" -- No -- by a boy who totally loved me. haha. Hopefully the pic turned out well though.

On the way back an old man gave me a calender (that he "got for me" -- from hallmark, for free I think) and gave Abbey some craft tips... he was really nice... And then on the bus home we had to sit next to the most obnoxious child gangsters who were being very inappropriate.

It was a very tiring but wonderful morning.

rockin'

counting on the night for a beautiful day
i shake it your way, i shake it your way
and i say you can't get enough
now you just can't get enough
given a chance i'm gonna be somebody

sorority food

I am so freaking sick of our sorority food.

tonight, because I hate/am so so so tired of the same dinner we have every night, I ate bread pudding for dinner and now I'm having the most terrible stomach cramps.
awesome.

I can't wait for winter break! x1,000!

pre thanksgiving

I went home this weekend.

On my way back I was thinking about Sundays. They made me think of pre-church Starbucks and McDonalds breakfast with my favorites. I really my friend Micah. A lot.

I did get to hang out with Jessie, Katie, and Daniel this weekend which is always good good. Oh, and I saw my friend Heather for the first time since her wedding this summer, yay! I miss her too!

Oh and I told Ground I could work over winter break... ummmmmmm...

Jessie and I had homework/catch up time this weekend! I got a lot done on my personal and diversity statements, whoo! Law School: here I come!

birthday blues

can I start off by saying that the gray hairs on my head are growing more and more plentiful every day? I can see them running through my braid today and I'm sick of it... I hate being "old"

so anyway, my birthday this year was, uhh, different...

I barely slept the night before due to a fever I had woken up with that day, then to my delight on my birthday I woke up still encumbered by the fever. I finally got out of bed and was swept away to Starbucks with Joel for breakfast where I could swallow only a few painful bites of my spinach feta wrap and couldn't drink my latte until I had some orange juice to help my throat. I then came back to ZTA, showered and went to an initiation ceremony. Directly after that (this whole time feeling like crap due to my fever, body aches and throbbing throat) I had to go to work. But to my surprise, Joel was waiting at my car with tulips (my favorite) and a cold buster Jamba Juice (my other fav). Awww moment. It was really nice (too bad none of my other friends even thought about me, minus Katie who drove down and bought me dinner... seriously though, no one got me a gift or offered to even buy me a drink (and it's not like they did last year either, since they weren't 21 at the time and couldn't celebrate with me, it was really really really shitty, especially after I have made huge efforts to make a few of their birthdays super special... I'm obviosuly really upset about that) Then I went and tutored an athlete (he had a midterm on Monday he needed help with). After that I proceeded to the village to find a martini glass to decorate for my i-week secret sis. After decorating her martini glass and her room I went to Joel's to rest. When I finally woke up Katie was in town. We met in U Vill where I got the worst make-up job ever at MAC. We went quickly to H&M then home so I could wash off the terrible terrible makeup (think really bad purple and black, like a black eye against my pale pale complection and clumpy (like 3 big clumped) eyelashes) cool. We hurried to get ready and make our dinner reservations. Dinner was: Me, Katie, Erin, Danielle, Joel, Micah, Dave, Hoang (Hogieee), Kurtis, Ashley and Leslie. I had some margaritas (they were on special, ever Friday night at the Broadway bar & grill) and a tequila shot!! Whoop! OH and for dinner I had eggs benedict (which was the first real, substantial thing I had eaten all day). It was delish. After dinner there was some drama. I ended up paying $50 (this is after katie had paid for my meal as a birthday gift!!) for dinner becuase people are super cheap and terrible. After this I had no money (and didn't bring my card becuase it was my birthday and I didn't want to spend any more than $50 on food and drinks and cover for the night) and so my plan to go out on capitol hill was shot. I ended up almost crying while Joel drove Katie and I back to the U district (because I had a shitty week and because my friends were being super super sucky). Joel was super sweet though when he took us to my sorority so we could get our cards then drove us to Finn's. Too bad Finn's doesn't do 22nd birthday mind erasers, or something equivicol. Katie bought me a drink though (captian and 7), and eventually Hogan showed up and he bought me one too (a mind eraser, actually). Then we decided to go to Earl's to see if Dave was working. He was. After Dave bought me some Earl's/Dave's strawberry lemonaids (and after some more of my sisters showed up) I blacked out and drunk dialed my mom. UM OOOPS! I felt and still feel SO awkward about that. Then I blacked out cried until I went to sleep because I was so upset over everything. Awesome. The next morning I woke up drunk and when I finally sobered up I was on the way to Federal Way with Joel and ended up making him pull over so I could puke on the side of the road. I'm classy, what can I say?

My one year anniversary of my 21st wasn't at all what I expected. Boo.
:(

the girls after dinner:Joel and I at dinner <3

at Earl's...

elk hunt adventure

last weekend my dad took my Uncle Bert on an Elk Hunt in Idaho and this is what they came back with! A 390something 7X7 elk! It was GIGANTIC! and amazing!

my uncle bert with the horns:

My dad and my uncle Bert are SUPER stoked!
(I would have been too!)

I love...

that there is a song by the Clash (Police on my back) in Knocked up

at the part where she realizes she's preggers and goes to the store to get pregnancy tests

thank you, HBO!

election day 2008

Today I'm going to have to agree with Carrie Underwood:

"There is someone I do support, but I don't support publicly. I lose all respect for celebrities when they back a candidate. It's saying that the American public isn't smart enough to make their own decisions."

And Jay Z:

"You can pay for school, but you can't buy class."

I have a bad feeling:

so tragic, I don't know what I would have done if I would have seen this. I was walking by red square on my way to class right after it happened (the poliece weren't there yet) but I decided to go a different way to get to my class... thank God...

link to daily article and picture...

and then today I saw a man who had just ran into a car while on his motorcycle, he was laying in the middle of Montlake (street) and I wasn't sure if he was dead or alive.... it was a disaster. The police and ambulances were there, but it made my stomach drop. It didn't help that I first saw it when I was walking across the bridge to work, so I saw it from an areal view... :( ughhhh I have a bad feeling about today.

ZTA fall formal

Last night was the Zeta Tau Alpha fall formal at the Westin downtown! Erin and I got our hair done at Gene Juarez before (Katie came too and got her hair done for a dinner party she was going to)! It was amazing! At the dance we hung out downstairs at the bar for a while and danceddddd and afterwards Joel and I went to Alpha Delts to celebrate them being initiated! The UBC guys were down from Canada too, sooo that was awesome! At the end of the night I decided that it would be a really good idea to take pulls of Jack Daniels with Kurtis (who I LOVE) and then pass out in my dress.... whatevs! I've done nothing productive today. Haha. Good times.

Here are some pics for your enjoyment:

Brittany and I: Julia, Erin, Dolly, Alli, Me, Kylee and Stephanie at the dance (slash bar)

Me and Erin and her date :)

Joel and I

me before:

halloween 2008

the LSAT

I hate this and I hate that I'm doing it all over again:

15. Zack's Coffeehouse schedules free poetry readings almost every Wednesday. Zack's offers half-priced coffee all day on every day that a poetry reading is scheduled.

Which one of the following can be properly inferred from the information above?

(A) Wednesday is the most common day on which Zack's offers half-priced coffee all day.
(B) Most free poetry readings given at Zack's are scheduled for Wednesdays.
(C) Free poetry readings are scheduled on almost every day that Zack's offers half-priced coffee all day.
(D) Zack's offers half-priced coffee all day on most if not all Wednesdays. right answer.
(E) On some Wednesdays Zack's does not offer half-priced coffee all day. my answer.

okay, I understand why D could be right BUT: it says it schedules free poetry readings ALMOST every Wednesday (NOT EVERY) and when it does it offers half-priced coffee. We don't know if they offer half-priced coffee when there isn't poetry. It makes you think that if there is no poetry there is no half-priced coffee. This question sucks. I hate the LSAT. I hate that I'm doing this all over again.

in White Salmon

I've been thinking...

Where did I lose you and when? Did it
Happen even as we knew we were
discovering each other that first time.
Was loss a piece of swelling
big as the enlarging heart?

...


The daisies saying love me now
or love me not.
If I have thought about you more than
now it must have been some other me
living in a different heartbreak house
surrounded by some other hedge of memory.


so relevant right now :( too bad.

but I'm in White Salmon right now trying to figure out what to do...

laugh out loud

Ok, you all know I'm a supporter of McCain/Palin (and the republican party) but this made me LOL SO hard:

Ohhhhh Spidey! Get a life.

the sun also rises

I am so so so in love with this book right now. Hemingway's prose is concise and amazingly crafted. It's so relateable on so many levels. Mmm, lovelove.


"The waiter came and said the taxi was outside. Brett pressed my hand hard. I gave the water a franc and we went out. 'Where should I tell him?' I asked.
'Oh, tell him to drive around.'
I told the driver to go tot he Parc Montsouri, and got in, and slammed the door. Brett was leaning back in the corner, her eytes were closed. I sat beside her. The cab started with a jerk.
'Oh, darlking, I've been so miserable,' Brett said" (Hemingway 32).

did I mention I want to go to Paris?

"To hell with you, Brett Ashley.
Women made such swell friends. Awfully swell. In the first place, you had to be in love wtih a woman to have a basis of friendship. I had been having Brett for a friend. I had not been thinking about her side of it. I had been getting something for nothing. That only delayed the presentation of the bill. The bill always came. That was one of the swell things you could count on.
I thought I had paid for everything. Not like the woman pays and pays and pays. No idea of retribution or punishment. Just exchange of values. You gave up something and got something else. Or you worked for something. You paid some way for everything that was any good. I paid my way into enough things that I liked, so that I had a good time. Either you paid by learning about them, or by experience, or by taking chances, or by money. Enjoying living was learning to get your money's worth and knowing when you had it. You could get your money's worth. The world was a good place to buy in. It seemed like a fine philosophy. In five years, I thought, it will seem just as silly as all the other fine philosophies I've had." (Hemingway 152).

the best plan ever

I was just talking to Jessie via facebook (because four hours currently separates us) and we came up with the best plan I've ever heard. Ever.

We buy Ground (because who needs Law School when you have coffee?), employ ourselves (obviously), Heather, steal Sarah away from Dutch bros, lure Greg back (mmmmm Greg) and when I told Kylee about the plan she wanted to get on board too. That way we're all together in Hood River (the best place on earth) and close to everyone we LOVEEEE (you know who you are). Ground will start booming again (b/c who wouldn't want coffee from us?) Hah.

I'm stoked. Great morning.

friday night out in Hood River

met up with Daniel and some other friends at the Pub...

Me, Jessica and Daniel shared some really SPECIAL times :)
at the Pub, then Double Mountain, then Jack's then Brian's Underground, thennnn the Red Carpet....

and we had oyster shooters...

and a scorpion bowl
(but shhhhhhhh don't tell the people at Jack's that we shared with Daniel)

and then after receiving a phone call I decided it would be a REALLY good idea to go to the Red Carpet... but I freaking LOVE this kid! We shared some special conversation (which I vaguely remember, but that doesn't matter) and the later we watched a movie!


I LOVE Hood River Friday nights!
love love love
such a great night

an

opening day

I know it's kind of small (1x2), but I was excited anyway! :)

loans

From the Seattle Times today:

Hunter, 23, also happens to owe $152,000 in student loans, accumulated in four years at Boston University. He graduated last year with a bachelor's degree in business administration, and now earns $40,000 a year at a market-research company.

His loan payments soon will top $1,000 a month — the amount of a small mortgage, and about a third of his salary. If he makes the minimum payments, he will retire his student debt when he is 53 years old, having handed lenders some $300,000.

that FREAKS me out!

Law school is like $40,000/year for TUITION plus thousands for living expeses (whcih I can't help at all with freshman year becuase they make you sign something saying you won't work your first year). After three years of law school I'm going to have around $120,000 just from tuition. Crap. And now the economy totaly sucks too so there isn't even a guarentee that I'll be able to get loans/pay them off after I get my JD/get a job after school! What am I supposed to do?

I <3 candy corns and Lewis and Clark Law School

I just checked my mail and I had a package addressed to "Shalom Osborne" from New York Law School and something from Lewis and Clark!
It turns out that my something from L&C is a packet about Indian Law and Minority Law Students. I'm so so soooo in love. I want to go there a million times more right now. I REALLY hope I did well on my LSAT. sigh.
I started tutoring today. What great timing, hua? The boys I've had so far are really cool and seem motivated. Yay. I have one more tonight at 7. Holler.
Also I'm meeting my mentor student, Shanoa for coffee in the morning (for the first time) yay :):)

I need a night of drinking. Some shots maybe. Celebration of being done (for now).

HUNTING SEASON STARTS SATURDAY!
home home home home LOVE
(my dad already got a deer mussel loading saturday morning while I was testing my life away. I'm jealous)

relaxation

so today is my "relaxation day" before the LSAT (I'm pretty sure it's everyone's relaxation day before the LSAT actually). So, Erin, Alli and I went and got pedicures at "welcome nails" (aka the best asian nail place on the ave). Then because Alli had class at 2:30 we took her home and Erin and I went down to H&M in Uvillage. I bought a pair of really skinny jeans (thank you scholarship money)! I'm pretty excited! They're super cute (and about $100 less than I normally spend on a pair of jeans!). I also got a white tee and a sweet ring. BUT I'm pissed because the coat I really really want and have wanted for a long time (that they only have in size 10 and 12, bitches) totally fit Erin, so she ended up getting it (whore.. haha jk). Then because it's raining and I still need to go over everything LSAT wise once more today, we went to starbucks and got lattes.

OH! also, last night I went over to Alpha Dlets to visit the loves of my life! It was pretty much phenomenal! They made a "matress room" by filling an empty bedroom with all of the extra mattresses they have! But they made it so that there is a pit in the middle (like a layer of matresses and then matresses built up around the sides and an empty space in the middle) which they filled with ballons and packing material. It was magical. It's the little things in life that make me the happiest. Haha. Seriously though: so amazing. Anyway, I loved seeing those boys! I miss them! Oh and the house is SO much cleaner now that all of the girls are gone. Weird haha. But yeahhh!

LSAT tomorrow! Send some good thoughts/wishes my way!

crisis

this whole financial crisis is freaking me out! what if our country goes into a major depression (think 1920s style) and after graduation I'm not able to find a job or afford to go to law school (because banks won't loan me money and everyone knows that basically no one can afford $40k/year in tuition plus living expenses after you've signed a contract promising you won't work your first year)???

crap.

ever the same

I just realized that all of my [latest] posts say basically the same thing. Haha. SORRY, but everyone is SO sick of hearing about the LSAT (in real life), and I still really need to talk about it ALL the time, since it's the only thing I think about! So blogspot.com, thank you for listening to me vent about this test! And if anyone else is reading then I'm... wait, I'm actually not sorry becuase while you might have to listen to me talk about it in real life, you can close the browser at any time you chose and be exempt from my stress.
<3

cash it all in, give it all up

"I wanna hold you baby right or wrong, Build a world around a country song, Pray a sweet prayer, Follow you there, Down in history...
I wanna love like Johnny and June, rings of fire burnin' with you. I wanna walk the line, walk the line, until the end of time. I wanna love, love ya that much; cash it all in, give it all up. And when you're gone, I wanna go too, like Johnny and June."

such a nice song :)

Today is my dad's birthday!!! We got him a digital video camera to take on his and my uncle Bert's elk hunting trip to Wyoming (or somewhere) this fall! He was really excited about it! Also today: Forgetting Sarah Marshall came out on DVD today. I'm stoked! Joel and I are going to go to Target later (after class, pre-law-club meeting, and tons of studying and video games/homework for him) so we can get it (and project it at the barn tonight) and so I can get the Sex and the City movie (so that I can watch it a million times on Friday afternoon, after my studying, manicure, and tan -- gotta MAJORLY de-stress before this test).

Anyway, I've realized that I think I've "hit the wall" studying for the LSAT. I'm gonna do as well as I can, and that's probably not as good as I wish I could do, but I've been trying SO hard for SO long. I haven't drank in weeks, I study for hours every day, I go to class/tutor sessions/help sessions multiple times every week. I've done just about everything I can at this point. And I guess that if I don't like my score I'll re-take it. And that will suck, but whatever.

Moral of my story: I want to love what I do when I'm older. Even if I don't end up with someone who I love forever with all of me (I really hope that happens) I want to end up doing something that I love forever, with all of me! And the LSAT is the first step in that process! Haha. I'm cool.

LSAT (oh no)

LSAT a week from today. Boo.

I'm sorry to everyone that I've blown off in the last few weeks... This thing is seriously consuming my life (I'm either studying for it, doing the other necessary things in my life, or being so stressed out that I'm freaking out/exhausted). I'll make it up to you after next Saturday.

I've come to the realization that I'm probably pretty ready for this test. I know that I'm not where I want to be (score wise) but even when slowing down and taking un-timed tests I'm still doing basically the same as I would if I were taking it timed (minus the fact that I'm not finishing all of reading comp when I take it timed). So I guess there isn't a lot left for me to do at this point. And, if I don't do as well as I want then I guess I'll be taking it again in December, which will suck, but I want to go to law school and I'll do whatever it takes to get there.

I guess this whole experience has been making me think about why exactly I want to do this whole law school thing (I mean, right now it's honestly ruining my life a little)... I have come up with a lot of good reasons that I'd rather not share on here... But FYI they're legitimate and well thought out. I really want to do this, and I know that I can... eventually.

But today I'm going to study some more, get ready, get dinner and go to the UW vs Stanford football game--my first husky game since freshman year!!! I'm pretty stoked. Then, practice test in the morning, take a break for an hour or so (get some food), grade and go over my test and then the 200 or so pages of reading I need to do before my monday and tuesday English classes... cool! Haha.

don't you wish you were me?

overload

Last night was super relaxing (especially compared to the night before with my major freak out). After a repeat LSAT class/convo with Stephen (my teacher) about the test (next saturday) he suggested that I get a milkshake (since I'm so stressed out I've lost my appetite/have no energy/feel nauseous all the time etc etc). So, I picked up Joel and we went down to Kid Valley. They were closed. Everywhere was closed. We ended up at Haggen Daz on the Ave where I got a $6 chai milkshake that was GROSS. We then went to the asian fish place and got some onion rings that were all batter and no onion. Haha. After eating our gross meal in my car on the ave (classy, I know) we went back to "The Barn" (aka Joel's house) and watched the Office (which Joel had T-Vo-ed) on the boys' huge projector. Amazing.

Today I had to go to a new tutor training session for four hours. I learned about at risk athletes, got a tour of the athletic facilities, learned how to get paid, and learned about the union. It was pretty boring/not useful. I think that all of the really important stuff (the payroll stuff and the NCAA rules about tutoring and the online forms you have to fill out after every session) could have effectively been covered in about an hour. While it was nice that I got paid for all four hours, I hated my life a little during it. I also hated the 25 min walk back after (oh PS thanks sister Kylee for our starbucks date and then driving me down to the session this morning when it was cold and rainy, love u!). I did learn though, that since I am an employee of the UW I can get a faculty parking pass (haha sweet). Too bad it wouldn't be worth it just for my job! I guess the long walks will do me good!

Now tonight Joel and I are going to see Burn After Reading at Lincoln Squares with our free movie tickets, which we acquired after the last time we went to see a movie there--Pineapple Express--and the lights shut off with like 20 minutes left in the movie... I still don't know how that ended... Either way, I'm pretty stoked for tonight.

Tomorrow is the UW vs Stanford FB game, and the first college/UW football game I've been to since my freshman year (when I hated my life becuase everyone else was prefunking when I didn't drink and it made me feel terrible). Although I'm not prefunking this game (LSAT in a week.. alcohol makes me retarted) I might hit up a few tailgaits and get some snacks! So everyone deck themselves out in their purple and yellow and watch the game at 7pm (you can look for me on the TV)! It should be a good one considering our coach who sucks at coaching here used to be the coach at stanford where he had a ton of success... drama drama! Should be good! Go Dawgs!

early morning

This morning I watched Joe before school (Claire leaves for school/the bus early now that she's in middle school). I was really tired, I can't remember the last time I got up at 6:15 to go to work (or just in general), spring quarter? The worst part was: I didn't get paid. I think Dian forgot... I need to e-mail her about that ASAP.

While dropping Joe off at school/waiting for the bell/watching him do monkey bars for 10 minutes, I watched this poor dog have a seizure for like 5 minutes! I literally thought it was going to die. I felt so bad for the dog (and all of the small children around it)... But much to my (and everyone else who was watching) surprise, when the poor pooch's owner was brought over she didn't seem to care. Now, I know that I'm not the hugest animal fan, but still! If you have a pet you should at least care enough about it to be concerned when something like that happens, especially when you're in front of hundreds of children and their parents/nannys!!!

After the playground disaster I met Joel at starbucks on the Ave for a coffee date. He had an 8:30 this morning and got out of class early, so it worked out perfectly. Sicne the starbucks on 42nd and the Ave is right next to the Ave Copy Center I was able to buy my last book/course pack for this quarter before stopping by Bartell's so Joel could pick up some pencils. I hate buying school supplies/books... it's always so expensive. Thankfully I only ended up spending like $150 this quarter (yay half.com --the best place to buy books they don't have used at the bookstore).

I realize that this post really isn't that interesting for anyone else, so I'm gonna go shower!


Oh! Goal: Lose like 5(ish) more lbs (which won't be hard if I stay at this level of stressed-out-ness (you know, stressed out to the point of loss of appetite)!) and buy some really skinny jeans and rock them, yesss!

UGG boots and Backpacks

The first day of fall quarter means that today I got to put on my UGG boots and backpack, fill my Holstein's coffee cup and walk to class (of course my first class wasn't until 1:30, you've gotta love being a senior ahead in credits). I arrive at my first class (English 422 or something, AKA Arthurian Legends) to find a graduate student informing us that our teacher couldn't make it to the first day of class (emergency situation) and filling us in on how crazy he is. That's just great. Along with the fact that our old [fucking crazy] neighbor (one of the "Quagneau's"--her name is Lucy and I had one other class with her, she used a fake accent and would not shutup/stop sucking up the entire time) is in my class, sitting RIGHT next to me in the front row, I have a crazy teacher. I mean, I knew he was a little nuts because Kirsten took this class with him last quarter (she 4.0ed it, and I'm always looking for a GPA boost) and she filled me in a little about him, but still. Anyway so I got out of class after only 12 minutes of getting a reading handout and the syllabus, neither of which were stapled. On the walk home it started raining (it would). So, I busted out my juicy umbrella and made my way back. I need to waterproof my UGGs again ASAP. I also need to finish my practice test NOW. Oh and did I mention that I GET to wake up in the morning and babysit Claire and Joe at 7am (they needed someone to fill in... booo to me for agreeing). On the bright side (or maybe not, maybe just on another note), today was my last first day of fall quarter as a "college" (undergrad) student. Weird. I feel old.

vomit

worst feeling ever: knowing something bad is about to happen and having to wait for it. I feel sick.

what do I do? I can't concentrate.
I'm freaking out.

help
help
help
(please)

I want to be back home.

intelligent

I just read on MSNBC that Seattle is the smartest city in the nation.
That makes me happy.
(we would be)

painful

So,
today I got a massage (b/c my back has been KILLING me... literally SO SO painful) at SpaScotta. It was a therapy massage to try and fix my back/muscle problems so I won't constantly be in pain. So I am stoked to go get my massage, I get there, it's super super nice, I am getting more stoked, I go in the room, get undressed, lay down on the heated table under the cover and then started to get massaged. Oh. My. Gosh. it was the most painful thing EVER. It hurt SO bad. It was an hour of HELL. And then the lady preceeded to tell me that two of the muscles in my butt were stuck together or something (which I don't understand how that can happen...) and that's why/because my pelvis was shifting and causing my back to go into spasm. (and she told me that I should stretch/exercise more and it made me feel bad about myself) Now afterwards I'm super sore.

After my massage I went across the street to Uvillage to the new H&M! Stoked! It was amazing. The one at southcenter isn't as sweet (as the ones in England). I got a sweet native american shirt, a big purse/bag to use as a purse/bag to carry my books to school in, and a bra/underwear. Yay. I guess that made me feel a little better after the massuse was sort of mean to me (I'm sorry but I do exercise and stretch... she asked me if I walked ever... um YES a lot, every day thanks) Boo.

Now Erin and I are skipping LSAT class in favor of going tomorrow. We did just take the practice test yesterday and haven't really had time to go over it yet, so whatev. Oh, and I need to watch last night's episode of the Hills ASAP.

we love boys and booze

prefunk at Annie's and Leslie's apartment!

The boys serenading our new ZTA freshmen!

The AfterParty!!!

the after after party at Pikes :):)

I love the first day back after "no boys no booze"/rush!!
it's full of good memories every year!

bid day

So, sorority rush is finally over and now it's bid day! I can't wait until all of our new girls get here. I'm sort of upset that one of my good friends from High School (who I preffed here) isn't going to be here today... but I guess there isn't anything I can do about that now. I think that more than anything I'm just frustrated at a few conversations I overheard/heard about. But, overall I guess things turned out well because we have a new pledge class of 35 (super cute super awesome girls)!!! It was more than we expected, and we don't really know how we're gonna fit in everyone, but I guess it will all work out :)
AND I'm done with sorority rush FOREVER! Now I have Presentation night to look forward to! And no boys no booze ending tomorrow!! Yay! and then graduation haha... wow, I'm old!
Also, I NEED to hit up the H&M in Uvill ASAP! It's like 30 seconds from my house and I'm so so so excited! Maybe I'll go after I shower today!

when it rains...

how come everything always goes to shit all at once?

but,
after getting yelled at by Sandy at the review last night Steven was uber nice tonight...
he bought me a latte (no one else... just me, and he kept bringing it up in class to make points about logical reasoning questions, obvi)
and then he ordered the whole class pizza
and then he gave me a chocolate bar (again, no one else) b/c he wanted me to be happy/awake for sorority things tonight.
we're obviously in love. hahaha.

I don't like to be a giant complainer, but I feel sick, my back hurts, my boyfriend is a tool, rush is killing me slowly, and there are enormous spiders (nightmares) on the porch.

seriously, "when it rains it pours" (not a huge fan of cliches but I'm tired).
I need to go to the doctor/chiropractor/masseuse about this back thing.

mentor

also...
today I found out that I got paired with an EOP minority student to mentor fall quarter (whoo). I'm excited! I got a billion paperwork attachments and a little bio about her. apparently she loves biology and she wanted to be paired with a native american mentor. I wonder if she will be disappointed? I'm not your typical native america. that's so not my fault though.

maybe she loves coffee and fro-yo too? I will find some way to win her over :) i'm good at things like that, sometimes.

what a day

today:
-1st day of rush
-I love floating
-the lady doing the LSAT review bitched me out for like 10 minutes for sending ONE discreet text message and then felt bad an had a 10 minute conversation with me after class... BOO!
-my back hurts
-my brain hurts
-my teeth hurt
-my face sucks
-my boyfriend blows
-I am afraid of the spiders on the sleeping porch

let the love tear us apart!

rush starts: TOMORROW!

I am: floater

I've got my sugar free mints, my note cards, my lip gloss, a pen, and a box which needs to be assembled ASAP and taken downstairs.

I don't think I can go home home until Saturday after Rush. Sunday BID DAY, Monday LSAT review, Tuesday LSAT class, Wednesday nada, Thursday PRESENTATION NIGHT (the night where the new freshmen get presented at ZTAs to the whole world, also the night where we get dressed up in cocktail dresses and take professional pictures and then go to dinner. Seniors are going to greenlake bar and grill then garage barring (prefunk meeting the new girls parents ha), presentation then EARL's on the ave!) and I cannot miss that night, then Saturday morning is Abbey's 3rd (Madeline themed) Birthday party!!! Hopefully I can take a practice test before Presentation. So so much to do.

Also, I just got into an Arthurian Legends class for Fall quarter. So right now I'm taking two 400 level English classes, and a 3 credit seminar about my future or something. I might drop that if I get a minority EOP student to mentor though :)
= the end is nearing

My parents went to the redwoods this weekend. I wish I were home to throw a JORTS party. I wonder if Jim had one without me while they were gone? It should be a tradition! The one last year leaves my heart scattered with delicious memories. And also some kind of terrible ones (fatty!). But whatever! :):)

Anyway. Time to LSAT it up some more before bed! Need to raise that score two more points before the next test! Whoo!

no boys no booze

this whole no boys no booze thing started yesterday and I already can't wait for it to be over with. I also finished moving everything out of Alpha Delts yesterday (sad!). I miss living there, in my own space, and not being told what to do. Haha, it's the little things that make me happy. Although, because we didn't have internet at ZTA until last night (late last night for me because my computer freaked out and didn't want to work) I've got a lot of LSAT sudying done, which is super cool.

3 days until RUSH!

Oh and you should listen to "lets dance to joy division" by the Wombats... it's putting me in a good mood today!

I'm sorry

So apparently people do read what I write on here....

Because of that I want to let you all know that this is just a way for me to vent and isn't EVER meant to hurt anyone's feelings. I honestly wouldn't post things about people if I thought they cared enough about what I thought to read it. I'm pretty sure that my dislike/frustration with MOST people is shared completely and I feel that venting in a "safe" place is better than blowing up at someone to their face. I also feel that there is a fine line between venting and talking shit and I'm sorry if anyone feels that I have crossed that line.

oh BABY!

So good news!!!!:

Baby Amelia Mary Koory was born yesterday (August 24th) morning!
I can't wait to meet her!

Also,
my parents are in town right now. They got here around two. We went to the apple store (b/c my mom has to be present for them to sell me a phone apparently) and I got a new, non-cracked-screen iphone! Yay!
After that we (wait for it--what a treat!) went back to Alpha Delts and I showed my parents around the frat I call home (haha). Of course my mom looked in my fridge and was probably disappointed in my lack of food and abundance of booze. It's mostly other ppls (in my defense).
Then we went to Jalisco's for some delish Mexican.
Since we were already up north and my dad needed shoes we went to Nordstrom and then after having zero luck finding my dad's size 13 wide tennis shoes we went to Joe's. We got him some sweet sneeks there (which, if anything like his current pair of shoes, he will wear until the day he dies--or until the day I decide he's FINALLY old enough to earn that pair of grandpa shoes he was eying that wouldn't allow him to purchase).
Across the way from GI Joe's is Ross. My mom wanted to go (and let me tell you this is not some place I normally enjoy... too much mess for my liking) but I found myself in the shoe section looking for about 1/2 hour with my dad for the mate to a BEAUTIFUL pair of round-toe heels. AND (drum roll) they were only $10! Whoo. Thanks Dad for all your help finding my shoe mate! Ha.
Then we went back to their hotel (decca). They're on the 15th floor and have a really sweet view of lake washington, lake union, the skyline, the space needle, the mts (everything basically). I had to leave their room to come back to the frat so I could get my phone which was charging in my computer, but we're gonna go get some ice cream pretty soon...
yay mom and dad <3

new habits die hard

so far today I have only consumed about 150 calories.
I've had 4 prunes and a cup of coffee.

this could be attributed to the fact that it's only three, I've been studying LSAT since I showered and I didn't wake up until 10:45 because I lent my mind (and body) to dreams about bingen bars with boys who shun me and internment camps.

But, I think the culprit is probably my lack of a kitchen and the fact that I know that I'll go out for dinner. I go out for dinner (or happy hour-because of the cheap food, not the alcohol which I rarely ever decide on these days) almost daily. If it weren't for restaurants I don't know what I would do. probably starve. or grocery shop. Thanks to those calorie packed meals I seem to be sustaining the weight I gained from a July filled with fratty alcohol and a lack of exercise.

I need to bring back those better, healthier eating habits (lifestyle) I am usually so anal about.

Rod McKuen

http://www.mckuen.com/poetry/rediscover.htm

this is the most amazing thing I've read in a long long time.
go read it (again and again)

(thank you Heather (and Jessie) for introducing me to the joys of McKuen's poetry!)

Tonight...

...Erin and I watched the season premier of "The Hills"
and
the soundtrack was really good
and
I/we really like the "American Boy" song. A lot.
and
we also read magazines that we got from ZTA (and learned things)
and
we got (sober) Memos. It was a bad bad BAD choice (we were hungry after our LSAT review session). Now I understand why everyone always (drunk) vomits after eating there. Don't go there sober. Just don't do it.
Memos might be ruined forever for me, or maybe just for a few weeks!
and
it was our (Erin and my) infinite day in a row of sister dates, because we always want the same things at the same times.

personal statement

I should really be studying for the LSAT right now. I guess I should always be studying for the LSAT, it's really important apparently. And, I have a study session in like 45 minutes, but Erin and I just got back from one of our many many Sister dates - we went to blue c for sushi - we always want the same things at the same time. When we got back I got on the internet, and if you're reading this then I know you know that its a neverendingdownwardspiral.

I find myself longing for simpler things and the summers of childhood:

homegrown/homecooked foods

kittens <3

my mom's flowers
nature

History / memories
I've climbed on this shed, skinned/hung deer in here, got spanked in here, played basketball on the side, found kittens in here... and I'm sure my dad has similar childhood memories in /on/around this same shed since he has lived next door his whole life...

and being able to be away from "it all" completely and totally. I miss being able to go outside and not hear anything but the birds and the wind. I miss being able to see ALL of the stars at night, vividly. I miss trying to drag people outside to be with/watch the stars with me. I miss those people/that person.

My new life is pretty great too though. Just a lot different. I wonder if things will ever go back to that previous state? I guess probably not. The fact that all of my friends, friends of my friends, exes and friend's exes are having babies is probably a sign that our childhoods are over and its time to create something amazing for the ones we love.

(too bad my personal statement can't just be a compilation of pictures, memories and feelings!)

On the bright side though, I'm very very very excite for Crystal to have her baby girl. I can't wait to finally meet her and finally learn her name. Abbey is going to be an amazing big sister and I KNOW Crystal is going to be so happy to get that baby out of her tummy (any moment now!)

yachting

Yesterday I went yachting on a 94 foot tugboat turned personal craft with the alpha delt boys, a few girls and some Alumns. It was pretty amazing. I had a beer and "a wine" and by the time we left I had a few job offers from Alums and a ton of new bffs. Haha. It was a good time... I'll show you:

seattle sunset from Shilshone Bay:

AlphaDelt PC08, including Jeremy (the newest member):

Jay's girlfriend and myself:

wow, really?

On the front page of the Seattle Times today (we saw it from inside of Costas while I was having breakfast with Joel and his dad) there is an article titled "How Old is "Old Enough" to Hunt?". So when I got home I got online and read it (obviously, I mean, I do love reading a newspaper but the internet is so much more efficient sometimes).

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2008109739_hikershot13m0.html

What the fuck was this kid thinking? I got my first deer when I was in 8th grade (13 years old) and I was DEFINITELY old enough to realize that it was a deer and not a PERSON! I cannot believe this happened. I am also in awe of the fact that 50 8-year-olds acquired big game tags this year. I'm pretty sure we all know that those 8-year-olds are really fathers of the kids who want an extra deer (deer is delish) to feed their families with this winter. But still! I thought you had to be a certain age (like 10 or something) to even take hunters education (which is necessary if you want to purchase a hunting tag). Wow. I just cannot believe this. Dumb kids giving everyone else a bad reputation. Anyway, I'm going to go start on my personal statement now (about living on a farm and hunting... I think). Wish me luck!

OH and PS I totally had a dream about the LSAT last night. I tried doing problems in my sleep and then I woke up right after I was taking the test and the building started to collapse and I couldn't get out because I just wanted to finish so I could go to law school. What do you think that means?

that's what I get

I wonder how I'm supposed to feel when you're not here, because I've burned every bridge I ever built while you were...

around.the.world

Alpha Delt Around the World party!
here are some pictures from the other night :)no noes goes!
(Erin, me and Alysha)

This is love...
(top- Micah, Sherry, Me, Kurtis, Alysha)

me and Micahhhh

Boob-grab!
(Alysha, Jay and myself!)

newness

Yesterday was a plethora of newness for me. I got woken up by a phone call inviting me to Dim Sum (or something like that--you know, it's a restaurant you go to in Chinatown, or wherever, and ladies come around with weird food on carts and you chose what you want from the carts...) which I had never been to--despite boyfriend#2s efforts. So I agreed. We met Micah's (super Asian) friend (who kept kinda creepy hitting on me, even though 1/2 the time I couldn't understand what he was saying) in Chinatown and proceeded to the Dim Sum restaurant. It was interesting. I liked the shrimp things. I wasn't a huge fan of the chicken feet on the table--they grossed me out! Anyway, after breakfast/lunch we came back to Alpha Delts and the boys proceeded to play ping-pong upstairs for hours.
Mid way through this Erin Herman came over, played a game of ping pong, we went to Emerald City Smoothie and then he left... I hadn't seen him in like a year!
Anyway, then I came back to the house and watched ping-pong and played mensa/lsat games with Doug, because we're obviously really cool! We did this for a little while before Erin called Doug and asked if we wanted to go Kayaking in Lake Union. I'd never been, and I can't really swim, but I went anyway!
So, we went kayaking (Doug, Erin, me, Micah, Micah's really asian friend and Kurtis). I was kind of afraid, a lot, but it ended up being ok. Micah and I were in a boat together (we all went doubles) and it was a total arm workout! It was really cool though.
Afterwards we were really tired and so we went to Red Robin, delish. Then I watched the boys play ping pong for a few more hours before going to bed! Haha. Cool times at Alpha Delta Phi.

job

So I got the athletic tutor job I applied/interviewed for. I start in Sept. Holler.

Also, I was babysitting Abbey this morning. We read some books, went to Zoka and got some chocolate milk, a latte and a bagel then we went to the park. After a few hours when we came home it was time for lunch, so I put on Abbey's favorite song while we were eating: "the long way around" by the dixie chicks. And it is SO funny to hear her sing all of the words, including my favorite part..

"I met the queen of whatever, drank with the irish, smoked with the hippies, moved with the shakers.. wouldn't kiss all the asses that they told me too"

haha I love Abbey! She's SO funny all the time! Terrible 2s? Not so much!

gone going gone

Erin is still in Nebraska. Joel is still in Orlando. Caroline left yesterday and went back to White Salmon (but she'll hopefully move up here soon).

On the bright side, alpha delts around the world tonight... I'm mexico/tequila! Horray!

And, Bellingham tomorrow! I haven't seen Katie in so so long! And, she moved!

home

I heart my new home (alpha delts). It's every thing I wanted and more.

Also, I'm excited for White Salmon for the 4th and first friday ha. Not excited for the lack of bars because Joel is yet to turn 21.

I am also very not excited about Erin AND Joel leaving me for over a week.

But, I had an interview today for an athletic tutor position, so we'll see how that turns out... I'll let you know!

finally

Today I changed up my routine as of lately (nothingness) and I volunteered. Erin's sister, Sarah, helps run this thing called Washington State First Response Wills or something long (that I obviously cannot remember); basically it is a group of attorneys and law students that draft wills for firefighters and police officers for free. It's a pretty sweet deal. Anyway, so Erin and I got up early, dressed in business casual and drove over to Bellevue to help out. I got to check IDs and be a witness to the notaries/sign people's wills and papers saying whether or not they'd like to be kept alive if they were in vegetable state. (and they fed us breakfast and lunch mmmm)

This whole experience made me realize that I need to start studying for my LSAT! Go go g-o Rebeka!

enjoying the view

I am in love with the Sand Point Country Club. I took Joe (the child I babysit) there today for his tennis and swim lessons and OMG its beautiful. Its huge and has a super nice golf course and it's on top of a hill overlooking the water and the mountains. I want to go live there. haha seriously though, see for yourself! That was probably the easiest/best $14/hr I've ever made (we went swimming with Joel after Joe's swim lesson), plus Joe and I ordered lunch on the family's member account. It didn't hurt that today was actually warm and sunny either. Sweet times.

fraud

This morning I was still asleep in my bed on the porch when my new ringtone started playing. I'm not really a fan of ringtones, but "workin for the weekend" makes me smile, soo... anyway this was the first time I had ever heard my new ringtone so i was a little confused until I realized that, "yes, that sound is coming from under my pillow". I half asleep looked at my phone and it was some 1800 number, so I obviously screened. At this point I was pretty awake. When they left a message I listened to the man at the other end inform me that there had been some fraudulent activity surrounding my credit card. Well I woke up, went downstairs, realized that yes my credit card was still in my purse (and no some creepy girl from my house hadn't stolen it). I called the bank back and they told me that someone had been spending like crazy and that the last place they had used my card was at a gas station in southern California. bitches. gas is SO expensive, why do you think you can use my card to fill up!? Anyway they stopped my card and told me that they would take care of the charges after I filled out some paperwork. Ugh. Not exactly the best thing to be woken up by...

the end of what we had

listening to: the new Death Cab For Cutie CD (which I illegally downloaded)

Today I attended a college graduation party. I don't get the point of a college graduation party. I understand having high school graduation parties because it's kind of like a good-bye/send off and a way for your friends and family to say: "congratulations, you're not a child anymore, good luck being on your own for the rest of your life... oh, and by the way, here's some money and gifts to help you out along the way". A college graduation party on the other hand is so pointless. It's a way to say, "oh, you graduated? great job genius! you should have fucking graduated after you parents spent $100,000 sending you to undergrad... and no, we're not giving you gifts, you're a big girl/boy now, you can buy your own stuff". People are so spoiled.

On a happier note: I am done with the initial writing of all three essays that are due this week. I just have to go back through and edit them one final time (probably two times in the case of my 10pg research paper) and then put my portfolio together and go hand in my research paper. I'm so close to being done. I can't wait for a break.

Oh and can I just complain for a minute about how our food is MISERABLE! Today Joel asked me what my favorite meal from ZTA has been in the last month. I honestly couldn't think of one. Our food is so terrible. Dinner was disgusting, so I just didn't eat. Maybe I'll drink with Erin and Noelle tonight to celebrate being almost done with finals and those calories will get me to where I need to be for the day. Oh, and the "finals study snacks" provided to us by parents club probably helped too... oops

Scandinavian final

I have my Sexuality in Scandinavia final tomorrow. I feel totally ready (just like I have felt for the last two tests, which I got a 3.0 and a 3.2 in.. wtf?) BUT, my final is comprehensive and worth 40% of my overall grade. I need to get at least a 3.5 in this class and it is making me hate my life more than a little right now. Finals stress me out more than I could ever explain to you. The worst part is that I have spent SO much time studying and I feel soo prepared that when I get my grade back I'm just going to feel like I'll never be good enough, and even my best efforts are not good enough. Awesome, thanks College!

spring fest

last weekend Katie and I went back to the homeland (first time in like 8 weeks, weird) and luckily it was spring fest. magically trashy. however, katie's mom was working the beer garden and hooked us both up with a beer before we left for better things (ex the pub and justine).

while I was home my dad went fishing (as usual) and Saturday morning he caught a springer (salmon) and so saturday afternoon we bbqed it. sooo delish. I also rode our new 4wheeler.

Saturday night we went to the taqueria, then to the pub then to sex and the city movie (best movie of my life) and then out. too bad everyone was tired and not down to pay the cover to get into river city. I did see some long lost hood river friends on the sidewalk. and a man who was staying at the vagabond hotel who told us we could meet him at his black suburban later that night. no thank you and who drives HUGE cars like that right now anyway? creepy on so many levels.

now it is dead week and I'm dying on the inside a little. let's be over-productive for the next week and a half. then its back home to recoup.

beach time

So, last weekend I went to Seaside with Joel (for the Pike's trip). It was a great weekend for the beach, because it was randomly like 100degrees outside. Saturday was SO nice, so I laid out on the beach all day and drank coronas and then we all decided to go into the ocean (Joel and I went all the way in, whoo, so cold!) Anyway, that was really sweet until I got out of the ocean and saw that, omg, the back of my legs were so extremely sunburned. Ugh. It was so miserable. Whatever, I think the Pig n Pancake, new shotglass ("don't be CRABBY have a drink!"), bumper cars, Ice 101, pool/hottub, the boardwalk, etc made it all worth it!
Anyway, then on Sunday we drove from Seaside to Colton, Oregon to my cousin Chip's wedding. It was so nice seeing my fam (immediate and extended (my little cousin tanner is so awesome!). Then Joel and I drove back up to Seattle (such a long day of driving, but totally worth it).



Anyway, last night was our ZTA spring formal at Golden Gardens. I was super excited for it (I got a new cute dress, new shoes (that OMG hurt my feet more than I can ever explain) , it should be fun...). It sucked. I got punched in the boob by one of my BFFs for no reason other than she was really drunk and thought It'd be funny, it wasn't. I started crying because it hurt so bad and then the rest of the night was downhill from there. Joel was pissed I was crying (but my boob hurt SO bad) and so he started getting grumpy with me. Ugh. So terrible. Anyway.

Today Joel surprised me with a Pedicure from Gene Juarez... it was literally the best thing that has happened to me in SO long. It was so amazing! Thanks! And later we're going to Jalisco's for some delish mexican dinner (mmm, I can't wait). Oh, and PS my sunburn is basically gone (well, kind of). haha.

brawl

Greek Week is coming to a close (oh no!) but not before last night's amazing Mariner's game (every year the greek system goes to a Mariner's game during greek week, it's fun times). Anyway in the middle of the game Richie Sexon had a ball [intentionally] thrown at his head by the other team's pitcher, which apparently pissed him off, a lot, so he charged the mound which started a HUGE brawl! It was AWESOME! Haha. Both teams and everyone from the bullpin came running out on the field. The MLG has some pretty good coverage of the fight. Seriously, it was even better than those Garlic Fries which I love so so much.

When Joel and I were walking back to my car after the game (we parked SO far away because we found some free parking, yay), a RAT ran out in front of us. It was the scariest thing ever. Oh yeah, and we got lost for like 20 minutes in the dark in the sketchy industrial part of Seattle. Cool.

Anyway, my parents are on their way up to Seattle to visit me for th weekend. We have ZTA Mother's tea tomorrow and then we're going car shopping for my mom (I want her to get a Mazda 3, SO cute!) and then my parents agreed to buy me a pair of jeans, HORRAY!!!

Anyway, the last night of Greek Week "events" is tonight. Sad day. Oh well, I guess this means I won't get woken up by the live band playing at TKE and Beta's biad at 8am anymore :) haha. I'm sad this was my last one ever. Yay College!

oh and ps

I love you for this.
Thank you.