I start bar prep tomorrow and I’m not going to lie, I am completely terrified. I do not want to do it. It is finally hitting me – I am going to have to spent the next 9 weeks studying. Not doing anything else; waking up, going to my $3,000 bar prep class, then studying until I go to sleep. That is going to be my life. And I do not want to do it. I want to have time for my boyfriend and my friends and my family and the sun. I want to have Rebeka time. The thought of not having those things is terrifying.
I’m afraid I won’t have the stamina to study as much as they say I need to study.
I’m afraid I am going to work really hard, and it still won’t be hard enough.
I’m afraid I’m going to fail.
I’m also afraid that I’m going to become depressed.
And to be honest, none of that sounds like fun. And I can’t stop thinking about how non-fun it sounds. And I woke up with a stomach ache, and I’ve had it all day. Because I’m afraid and nervous. The bar is already sucking and I haven’t even started yet.
But hopefully it’ll all be worth it. Right?
In the mean time, if you’re thinking about going to law school, don’t. Ha. I kid (mostly).
2 comments:
I can sympathize with all of those feelings. Perhaps the best advice is that "this too shall pass" and it will all be done and over before you know it!
I can appreciate that it is going to be difficult for you. :( However, I don't believe that you will fail, Rebeka, I'm sure you'll do well; honestly, I think you will succeed.
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